Day of a Thousand Carpools

Both girls have activities after school today — orchestra at one school, newspaper and anime club at another. Which shouldn’t be a problem because the two schools are located right next to each other and the activities SHOULD be over at roughly the same time.

But orchestra is held at Fairmount (as is Downers Grove Children’s Choir practice, which takes place later this week so I get to go there TWO times a week, to my utter delight and joy). What’s the problem, you ask?

You know those movies where panicked people are all trying to evacuate a city because a plague and/or aliens are coming and their very lives are at stake? Where bazillions of people are all trying to stuff themselves into one narrow means of escape? If you’ve seen that, you have an idea of what the pick up and drop off looks like at Fairmount School. I have witnessed countless near misses in the parking lot, both between two cars and between cars and children. It’s terrifying and chaotic and death-defying.

It’s extra special wonderful when Panthers is using O’Neill’s field for football practice, because shoving all those extra cars onto that narrow side street isn’t a problem at all. No sirree. Especially since (and I know and love many Panther families, so please don’t take offense) Panther families are batshit insane. They double park. They stop in the middle of the street and talk to each other. They open car doors without looking. They have a glazed zombie-like expression and walk like Frankenstein toward the field muttering “FOOTball FOOTball FOOTball” over and over until they collapse into their bag chairs.

On the other hand, O’Neill isn’t bad. Even with sharing a small side street with the YMCA, it’s pretty painless. Of course, they provide an activity bus that could, in theory, be taken home. But there is a problem with it. I’m not sure what that problem is, because I asked once and the answer involved mumbling and a droopy head and lots of hair. But it’s not a big deal, not like the hellish nightmare of Fairmount, so I don’t mind it anyways.

Later tonight it’s archery class, inexplicably held in Woodridge even though it’s offered through the Downers Grove Park District.

So maybe I exaggerated about the number of carpools I am involved in today. Slightly. But if you’ve ever experienced pick up or drop off at Fairmount, you know it FEELS like a thousand.