Tales From the Walking Trail by Moxie Puppypants

Moxie Puppypants, author

Moxie Puppypants, author

Greetings, humans. I regret to say there have not been meaningful walks taking place lately. When they do happen, they are brutally efficient affairs, with little room for leisurely enjoyment.

I did get to play outside in the snow with the smallest smallish human, however.  Here we are helping master move snow from one place to another:

IMG_0321

 

And then, we romped around in the snow, and the smallest smallish human made balls out of snow and threw them, and I pretended they were real balls and tried to catch them with my mouth, and then I chased them! And we built a little house made out of snow. But then we went inside because humans are weak and not covered in glorious fur like I am. But I still love them anyways.

Also, there has been more good news for Moxie recently. A short while after the plastic tree with the dangling doodads appeared in the place with the furniture I’m never allowed to lay on, a wonderful thing happened.

I got some things! Things I like and even LOVE! They were delivered to me on the same day that the smallish humans received things wrapped in paper that made them squeal and be happy. And then I was happy because I got these:

IMG_0322One is a bone, and one is chewy things tied together with a strongish rope so the humans can play with me and pull and tug! I will demolish it soon, though. It is The Way. I am not done worshipping the bone. I will chew it some day.

For some reason dumb Gizmo got things to like also. He’s already lost all his toys under big furniture where he can’t reach under because he is dumb and I still don’t know why he even lives here. He also got cat treats he didn’t deserve. I caught him looking at my bone. If you ever come to visit, you should just pet me and not him.

I am very worried about you weak humans out in the snow in your metal boxes with the wheels on them. They don’t seem very safe. Please take care of yourselves. I want to see you at the park with functioning arms and legs so you can pet me and tell me how pretty I am. Thank you.

 

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About susiecarroll

I threw off the yoke of corporate oppression for the apron of domestic aggression
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